Wednesday, April 30, 2008

All alone am I

I feel so much more isolated and alone than usual today. Last night I took a ride to my favorite bar for happy hour. I walk in a see Coleen there as I had hoped. She was hanging out with Dave the plumber. I grabbed a seat on the other side of Dave. Coleen looked happy to see me and even had something to give me. Nothing big, just a calendar but I felt special. Even though Dave was next to Coleen and had her ear more than I did I was feeling good.

I was even getting text messages from Lisa for some unknown reason. When i told her I was out she called me. So I went outside and spoke to her. When I returned inside I saw the bf, Mark had arrived. So I guess Coleen and him had resolved whatever what bad over the weekend. I made the best of it and after Dave headed home to the wife and dinner we started a pool game. Coleen played me, Coleen played Mark, and then I played Mark. Mark was actually very chatty and outgoing, which is unusual for him. It would have been really okay had I not wanted to steal his girlfriend away.

So after playing pool, Coleen and Mark started their own quiet conversation and suddenly I was staring into my beer and felt like I was no longer needed. So I finished the rest of my beer and looked to head out the door. I said my goodbyes and left feeling somewhat deflated. If I had any expectations before they are gone now.

So with all the others away until late Saturday I really am feeling like I have no one to talk to right now. Even Lisa has been off-line this week. Now I am working at home so there is no chance of interacting with anyone. My only consolation is it's all temporary.


jencham7 said...

It takes a long time to give up on a 2yr relationship.  No one wants to feel like a failure... especially a woman that age who has never been married.  (or has she been married?)  Not that I am saying she's old.......  but society generally expects women to be married by mid 30's.  
It will take time for her to finally let it go.  And if there's no major "last straw" it will take even longer.  Summer is coming, and if Mark is a stick in the mud (she sounds like she likes to have fun) then that may accelerate things.  She's already put a time limit on the relationship, right?
Be patient.  But keep your options open.  :)  
I don't know how people work from home...  too many distractions!!!

mikeg516 said...

Actually Coleen was married until 5 years ago. I realize that she really doesn't want to end what she has, which makes me sad but I should understand it. I kind of went down the same road when I got married to the wrong person. Wrong for me, anyway. Also, working from home has it's distractions but so does working in the office.