I'm in such a bad mood

Let me start by saying I need the bigger font size because I've lost my glasses. And I know exactly when and where. Doesn't help though because they are still gone. So now I've got to find a way to get through work barely able to see my print. I am very frustrated right now.

Let me tell you how this happened. Last night as I was leaving the office I got a call on my cell phone. So I got distracted as I packed to leave the office. Then while on the train my cell goes off again. It was Coleen who I was talking too as I got to my car and while i was looking in my backpack for my keys I put it onto the hood and the freaking alarm goes off before I've even got the keys. So I find the keys, the alarm blaring like crazy, Coleen still on the phone the bag falls over, I get the door open throw the bag inside get in and drive away. I wasn't until I got home that I looked for my glasses and couldn't find them. I must of left them on my desk, or so I thought. I'm here this morning and no glasses. Obviously they must have fallen out at the train station parking garage. There is no way they are still there. I don't know what's the matter with me lately. I've been losing things almost on a daily basis lately. My other set of glasses I left at Lisa's house and they are still there. The reason I have an extra set is because I'd left them home one day and had top go out and buy them to get through work. And I lost my umbrella last week. And again it was the train. I ned to start taking my time and getting prepared better.

So let me go more into detail about the Coleen phone call. It starts with a simple text and we go back and forth while I ride the train home. Her first message was "Happy Wednesday". Which I took to mean she was out of work early. We ended up talking a while and were still talking when the train arrived at my station. I have been broke for over a week and will stay that way until payday on the 15th. So I didn't ask her to go out which was a good thing because guess what ... she was at her boyfriend's house. What's with that... calling me from there? Then she says "do you want to talk to him?" Like an idiot I say yes. So there I am on the phone with Mark. As near as I can figure the whole world can see that I want to fall for Coleen (by that I mean sleep with) except for the one person who counts and that's Coleen. Why does this seem to happen with everyone I start to like...I end up getting close but only as a friend? Do I make this happen?

We ended up talking until I got to my house. She told me a little about Chris and Janet ... that she knew that Chris called Janet and asked her out from talking to him. So we compared notes a little since it was Janet who told me about it. Chris had tried to date Coleen too but they became friends. I feel like i am walking right in Chris' footsteps. Oh, well. Enough drama. I've come to accept that nothing will happen and I've got another new friend. I have to keep telling myself that she really isn't that great. The only reason I'm so attracted to her is because I can't have her.

I spent last evening listening to old Beatle records. The really early ones. I've been comparing the vinyl versions to the cd and I am more and more convinced that the original American stereo (Capital) releases sound so much better than the mono stuff on the CD's. I really want to get the box sets that came out a few year ago but they are $60+ and an expense I just can't afford. I'll keep listening to the records.  

Yesterday was Lisa's birthday and today is Valentines Day. I probably won't see her even this weekend and I'm a little sad about that. She would still be the first my choice if I ever could get my wishes to come true.