Monday, November 28, 2011

One day down and one day up.

What a crazy weekend I had. In the 4 days that I had off there was like a pendulum swinging back and forth, from great to terrible. Things start off pretty bad as I had work issues that pretty much ruined my chance to leave early on Wednesday, then Tigger goes AWOL for more than a day from Wednesday until almost midnight Thursday. There was also Carolyn calling me to tell me her daughter's car was leaking oil in the driveway. Not really leaking as much as pouring out of it. That seemed like it would be pretty bad and when she looked for me to help I wasn't confident that this would end well at all.
So Wednesday night was about as bad as bad can be. Then by Friday everything got resolved. Tigger was home and I had arranged for Carolyn's car to get fixed and it turned out to be a relatively minor repair that was completed by noon. Even the broken clothes dryer at Carolyn's that had been broken for almost a month was repaired.
Late Friday I went to Carolyn's and finished raking the leaves in her yard. There are about 50 bags in front of her house. I considered spending Friday night with her but I'd made plans to see a show with Lisa. In a really strange twist it is Lisa's fiance Carmine that fixed the car. It was Lisa who got the tickets to see a comedian (Jim Bruer for SNL) and I assumed he was coming along with Lisa's sister and brother-in-law. But Lisa said it wasn't his scene, what ever that means.
Okay, strap in because the ride gets a little bumpy here. Lisa no sooner gets in the car when she tells me she wants out of her life with Carmine. I've always been attracted to Lisa but it's never amounted to anything so I just let her tell me about what is bothering her. But we both wanted to have a good time so she just kind of said it's a struggle with someone like Carmine and then changed the subject. I was fine with that. On to the show. Turns out she didn't want Carmine going at all. The show was great. On the way out Lisa actually hooked her arm in mine, which was difficult for me to distinguish as a friendly gesture or an urge to get close. For the sake of my sanity I assumed it was friendly.
With that I dropped her at home where she and Carmine live together. I figured they would work things out and I had plans for Saturday with Carolyn. She wanted to go fishing of all things. While my boat is pretty much closed up for winter, I am storing it in the water so I could have it ready to go in just a few minutes. It was such a warm day we were out on the water until sunset. Having some alone time with Carolyn both Wednesday night and again on Saturday I started to ask her about where we are going. I was pretty much throwing myself at her. All I get back from her is how her life is so messed up she can't risk being with anyone. At this time all I want to do is kiss her, but she will have none of it. Without getting too into it, her pending divorce is about as insane as I've ever seen. Her whole life is lawyers, and court appearances. She is always thinking she is being watched. It's not paranoia as I am pretty sure her ex-husband has hired a private investigator that watches her.
So we talk and talk. I've explained to her that these things don't matter to me as I run the same risk either as a friend or more than a friend. But she's not ready. So we end the night Saturday going for drinks and dancing a little and I give her a kiss goodnight smack on her lips, but no tongues. Never going anywhere.
I awake on Sunday morning alone like always. My cell phone chirps with a text message but I'm not getting up for it for at least an hour. It was Lisa. She wanted to come by but I had some errands to do. The boat was not ready for cold weather so i needed to get that done but I said I'd be home by about 2. I had considered going to watch the football game at the bar. I suggested I stop by her house but Lisa said she wanted to see me at my house. Lisa loves to just relax in her living room on a Sunday so something was up.
Lisa comes in and I offer her some wine. I was engrossed by the football game. Then her cell phone rings and she took it outside. Odd I think. So when she returned I asked what was up ... I kind of knew what was coming. "He doesn't love me" blah blah blah. So I turn off the TV and I listen. I tell her how it isn't her and that he has intimacy issues and anything else I could think of. She said she needs to move out but she has no money. Now I have an extra room in my house that I use as an office, so I said to her she could move in and have that for as long as she needs it. I told her she could move and and save some money. I have no idea how that would even work. But it did make her feel stronger. I told her about how my relationship with Carolyn is. No one has it all figured out.
Two bottles later she told me she hasn't given up on Carmine yet. But it's coming. She left for home at 6 and I spent the rest of the night wondering how this will play out. I feel like I am about to turn a corner but which direction is still not clear to me.

3 comments:

Josie said...

Jeeze dude, stop the carolyn roller coaster. And for the love of god stop being the guy who rakes 50 bags of leaves and then goes home so she can go out with 'friends'. fuck that. :)

Now lisa.....if she does move in, please please please - agree to a nominal rent. Cash, grass or ass, no one rides for free. Even if it's $75 per week, which is a huge favor and incredibly cheap.

Mikeg5162000 said...

Okay - I get the tough love thing. Not sure what I wrote but the after raking the leaves it was me that went out with friends. Carolyn was home until we wejnt out on the boat - my boat. And the Lisa moving in thing was more about getting her off the "I have no choice" rant she was on. But thanks for the advice. My reality is neither of them are that into me. Just another road to nowhere.

Josie said...

Hmmm then you def need to exert your efforts elsewhere and you are a very good friend.