Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Darkness

Tuesday was such a blah day. I got nothing done at work which fine since there isn't anything due until at least after New Years. I am suffering from lack of sunlight. It's dark when I go to work and it's dark when I go home. If I don't manage to get to a window at some point during the day I never see the sun. This actually happens quite often.
My mind has been drifting. Since I won the first round of playoffs I keep looking at football stats. I know I only need to fill out and lineup and that can be done in all of 5 minutes on Thursday I am taking way too much time thinking of what I should do. I have a tendency to build myself up and I need to level out so that if I lose I don't get to disappointed.
I made it into the gym last night. I have been slacking off a lot lately and seems like I can't so half of what I was able to do only a few months ago. But at least I got there.
After I finished and had a nice dinner I reached out to Carolyn. We had made a tentative plan to have dinner on Wednesday and I wanted to remind her about it. Like I said it was tentative, which of course means she is cancelling. After talking to her for a few minutes I wasn't that disappointed. Her mood right now is really dark and sad. She is surrounded by an aura of negativity right now. She started to reel them off to me and it got old really fast. I thought, "yeah, maybe sharing a dinner with her right now is not so great". I tried to push her into some more positive things but she was not letting anything go.
So after 30 minutes I found an excuse to end the call. After hanging up I decided I still want to do something on Wednesday night. I still owe Lisa a dinner so I sent her a text. She never texted back so I guess she had put her phone away. She is not in a much better place than Carolyn, but at least Lisa will work her way out of it.
Seems like every woman I know is struggling with something. Maybe it's a lack of sunlight for everyone.

2 comments:

Josie said...

Carolyn's issues are way more than "darkness". i hate the frigging winter and the darkness it brings.

Mikeg5162000 said...

Yes, Josie. I try to put it in a way that isn't too harsh. My thinking is she has a new man in her life you would think she could find some security in that, but she seems to be reacting in the opposite way. Very frustracting.