I must say this blog thing has been very useful. I can go back and review my life and pretty much know where I was and what I was doing for just about any event for the last 4 or 5 years. On the one hand I can keep track of things very well, but on the other it does illustrate just how pathetic I can be. The biggest changes I want to make just never seem to happen, but all the other things are happening and I do get to see just how far I've come over these years.
No girlfriends have come along and I still find myself wanting only the ones I can't have. I feel much more empowered than I did a few years ago. I do believe my owning my home will bring me a sense of completeness that may be all I really need. I will be able to put my feet onto the ground and know that it's mine and as long as the bills get paid it will be mine and mine alone.
I've been feeling very distraught about what Roberta told me about Coleen. I still find myself wanting to make plans with her but at least now I'm starting to remind myself why I can't. I can change even when change is hard. There must be lots of other things out there. I should be focusing on what I have and not what I want.
It's Tuesday and tonight is another gym night. Lisa and I are planning to try to run in a 5K fun race on Easter morning. That way we can feel good about whatever food and drink we have later in the day. It's not definite but it sounds like a good idea.
I finished getting my mortgage documents together and sent them this morning via FAX. My plan is moving a little each day until I get all my things in order. My closing is tentative for May 24 but there may be a chance to have it sooner since the seller asked for April 30. Day by day it gets closer. My next task will be to tell my landlord.
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