Saturday, August 2, 2008

I got no thumb Charlie

"Charlie! They took my thumb!" (The Pope of Greenwich Village)

I saw this movie the other night. I'd seen it many times before and I didn't actually watch the whole thing. But I'd forgotten how good Eric Roberts is in this. He pretty much steals ever scene he is in. There is a scene at the end where he talks about how you can't be nice to your woman. Mickey Rourke's character was saying how his wife lest him and he didn't hit her or anything. "You can't do that man. I mean you don't abuse 'em once in a while they'll shit all over you. I don't mean you walk around morning to night whackin' 'em upside the head like someone from the other side but you terrorize 'em once in a while just to keep 'em in line. Know what I mean?"

It was a little sick and I could never see myself be that way. But it does seem like the women seem to find an attraction to these kind of guys. But enough about my thoughts on movies. On to real life.

My attempts at moving on from Coleen are not working so good. I mean she must really like me in some twisted screwed up way that is just making me crazy. Yesterday evening I joined Janet and some other friends in the bar at around 7. Everyone else had been there an hour or so. Coleen wasn't there. The plan was to walk downtown to see a band that was playing Motown and soul. We knew it would be good. Turned out no one really wanted to go except me and Janet. Then just as we are leaving Coleen pops in the door. Janet knows how much I like Coleen so she said she would go and I could talk to Coleen if I want But Coleen said she was just having one drink and going home so I said I was going to see the music and c'ya. Janet and I walked out together and headed down the street. While walking I tried to talk Janet into having dinner with me at my place. She was iffy.

We got there and we bumped into a few others we knew and like always Janet was mingling with all the people she knew but I didn't. So I was just enjoying the band. They were really good. Within about 10 minutes I get a tap on my shoulder ... it was Coleen. She decided to come down anyway. Very validating. We ended up dancing together the entire night. Dance, dance, dance = Fun, fun, fun. I'll never understand how she has a boyfriend who never likes to dance. So there I am once again feeling so connected and having the best time.

We ended the night getting a slice of pizza and I eventually found Janet via cell phone and she joined us. I still wanted to have dinner with Janet but if I mentioned it to Coleen it would have meant inviting Mark too so I didn't even say it. So there is the real issue now... the only time I can get close to Coleen is these spontaneous events because if I try to plan something it means she shows up with Mark. But I can plan things to do with Janet even though our relationship is as friends so there isn't any potential.

So this morning I talked to Janet and she bowed out of dinner. At least not at my place. Maybe I can just stay home today.  

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