Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Maybe last post?

I am told that tomorrow the network in my office will be adding new security protocols which will limit my access. This may be my last post for awhile ... I'll need to buy a new laptop to reach all the sites I use. That may not happen for weeks. Or I may just go right out and do it this weekend. I'm a little nervous about money.
Last night I enjoyed a nice dinner with my brother Brian and his wife Sue. We did a lot of talking about family issues. The biggest news is my bro-in-law Kenny has been diagnosed last Friday with stage 3 cancer in his throat. I'm not sure the level of seriousness this is but it's is very bad news. I have been hesitant to mentions it out of respect to their privacy. But Brian brought it up so we then talked at length. It really seems unfair that could happen to someone who has always lived a healthy lifestyle. There is a feeling of helplessness but as a close family we want to make sure we are there.
Then we talked about another family member Sean who has been struggling with his marriage. Brian has always been close to Sean and he struggles with seeing Sean in such despair. So I spent some time talking about how my divorce effected me. From there we segued into my life. We touched on all the women in my life and how none of them are right for me. There is a general consensus that I need to start looking at new things.
The name Coleen was brought up. Nobody thinks good things about her. My reaction is that no one needs to worry about me and her since she's made it clear there is no possibility of romance. I still find it hard not to think of her that way. Her name keeps coming up and I'm not even sure if it's me that does it. It must be though, because it happens almost daily. She has become hard wired into my brain.
My party plans should be my focus for the next couple of days. There is a long to do list and I'll start prepping tomorrow. The guest list has been my biggest source of stress. I need to just let it go and try to make it fun.

1 comment:

Cindy said...

So sorry to read about your brother-in-law. My brother who is only 5 years older than me just found out he had some blockages in his arteries, more than 90% - and he had stents put in. It has the whole family pretty shocked and shaken up. So I can understand some of what you're feeling.
I hope you will find a way of keeping your journal posts going. I don't know why, but I do enjoy reading them even if I don't always comment. Well....carry on :) I hope you're day is nice.