Better every day

I feel a little better every day. It's amazing what time does. I can survive anything. My trouble sleeping continues but it's a little bit better each night. Exercise helps a lot.



I have been making it into the gym as often as I can and I am now running just about 3 miles. Lisa has been joining me and it feels easier when she is there also. She is still working harder than me.... something that surprises me. She was never much of a runner but she has pushed herself which in turn pushes me. I always get an urge to quit at 2 miles more because I get mentally tired than just tired. But if Lisa keeps going so will I. Other than my feelings of better health I don't see much changing weight-wise or body-wise. Changes like that come so slow I'll probably never see much of a difference unless I do some kind of crash diet ... which I don't think I can ever do anymore. I just hope I can live as long and healthy life.



Meanwhile I still have barely heard from any of my circle of friends. I'm betting there is much discussion amongst Janet and Roberta ... although I have nothing that proves it. Just that they are being very distant. I counter that by being distant myself ... fight fire with fire I guess. There may be a better way but for now that is my tactic. At some point this weekend I'm sure something will break ... probably me.



I am still obsessed with buying myself a co-op. Today I plan to go get a bank check to send to the 401-k people to set up the loans so I'll have a down payment ready to go. Then next week I'll see what I need to do to secure a mortgage approval. I have this little voice in my head telling me if I don't do this now it may never happen. Here is a picture of what I hope will be my kitchen. I've seen about 6 or 8 different places and some were better and some were not as good. But I can see myself in this one. It felt like home.